Dublin Woman Shares Journey from Depression to Hope in Memoir

A Dublin woman, Cathy, has opened up about her journey through deep depression and addiction, urging others facing similar struggles to seek help and hope. Her experiences, which began when she was just 19 years old, are chronicled in her forthcoming memoir, titled Rabbit Holes and Rainbows. Cathy aims to dismantle the stigma surrounding mental health issues, particularly in Ireland, where such topics are often shrouded in silence.

Cathy’s battle with mental illness started after escaping a toxic relationship in Amsterdam. Upon her return to Dublin, she faced severe mental health challenges that led to a diagnosis of panic disorder. “At the time, I didn’t even know what anxiety was; it was never talked about in my family,” she stated in an interview with EVOKE. This lack of awareness made her initial diagnosis both a relief and a challenge.

Unfortunately, her mental health deteriorated further, leading her into a period of severe depression marked by suicidal thoughts. “I entered a dark psychotic depression during my late 20s, and then in my early 30s, I was hospitalised,” Cathy recalled. Over the next five years, she battled a debilitating condition that she described as waking up to a nightmare each day.

During this tumultuous time, Cathy became addicted to Ritalin and cocaine, which she now refers to as her “lowest of lows.” The impact of her addiction was profound, resulting in her daughter being placed in care. Despite the overwhelming pain of separation, Cathy recognized that her hospital admission was a turning point. “I hadn’t had any time to myself to actually recover,” she explained, reflecting on her need for solitude and healing.

Cathy spent five weeks in a rehabilitation facility, but her true awakening came with the death of her mother from cancer. The grief ignited emotions that had been suppressed for years and became the catalyst for her recovery. “It wasn’t until my mum passed away that it all clicked into place,” she noted.

Over time, Cathy worked diligently to overcome her addiction and manage her mental health. After 15 years of struggle, she found stability and rebuilt her relationship with her daughter. “I’ve been stable for the last five years, and I have an amazing relationship with my daughter again,” she stated, expressing her gratitude for the life she has created.

Cathy’s journey serves as a beacon of hope for others grappling with mental health issues. “You don’t have to die by suicide,” she emphasized. “I was at the lowest of the low and I found a way to get better, and so can you.”

Her memoir, Rabbit Holes and Rainbows, is set to be released soon and offers insights into her challenging yet transformative journey. Cathy’s story underscores the importance of seeking help and breaking down the barriers that prevent open discussions about mental health.